Dearest Dry Ink,

Flew first class into Santiago. A direct flight, very nice. Orange juice and Champagne and several glasses of Pinot Noir. I watched “Curb Your Enthusiasm” and ate a filet. The flight attendant fed me ice cream and fruit. Fell asleep to Femi Kuti. Greeted at the airport by family. Spent 5 days in Santiago. Saw family, went to a soccer game. Drank much Pisco Sour. Went to a family reunion in Olmue. Danced to Shabba Ranks. Took a cable car up to Cerro San Cristobal. Saw the Virgin Mary. Walked with hundreds of stray dogs. Ate much meat. Drank more Pisco. Took a 10 mile bicycle wine tour through the Maipo Valley. Drank Carménère and ate pastel do choclo. Went to Vina Del Mar. Saw more family. Danced and just drank and ate. Ate empanadas and mussel salad. Went to Valparaiso and Renaca. Walked along the beach. Went to the casino. Played bingo and got hit on by a transvestite. Ended up in a karaoke bar. Bought jewelry in the market place. Went to a museum. Went to an election. Got a new pair of pants. And a jacket. Saw a forest fire. Took a 14 hour bus ride to the South of Chile. Landed in Puerto Varas. Walked around The Llanquihue Lake. Eighty degrees and surrounded by snow topped mountains. The radio played AC/DC, Debbie Gibson, Phil Collins and Tupac. Ate seafood and had some red wine. Walked with ducks and more stray dogs. Hiked up to The Osorno Volcano. Saw the Green Lagoon. Saw blue and white and green water and blue and white mountains. Fed a fox and a pudu. Went to Chiloé Island. Saw a Chiloé horse. Took a boat and saw sea lions and hundreds of penguins. Saw cows in the middle of the ocean and birds with big noses and hands. Got chased by an angry stray. Drank Piscola and downed more empanadas. Watched a dog eat a pigeon. Jumped on first class back to the U.S. for more orange juice and Champagne. My seat was tilted back and my legs were in the air. The leather in the seat just swallowed me. See y’all soon. Don’t miss you yet.

Tom

Pictures. Check them out: Chile Photos.